OK. I promise my next gravity wave post will actually continue the explanation that I started here of what atmospheric gravity waves are and how they affect the weather. But, despite the fact that it’s not weather-related and may be non-interesting to many, I sometimes like to talk about funny/ridiculous events. As of August 1, I’ll officially be a PhD. But, the following may lend more credence to the idea that it really qualifies me to be in the shovel aisle at Lowe’s (PhD, Post-hole Digging tool), and maybe not the sharpest tool in the shed, either.
A long-time friend of mine from Samford (and blog reader), Charles Nickolaus visited Jennifer and me this weekend. I took him fishing on the Warrior River Saturday, and the fish weren’t too cooperative. However, my now 61-year old (but clearly not elderly) mom bought a Yamaha waverunner 2 or 3 years ago, but had not used it yet this year, so we decided to charge the battery, put some gas in, and take a quick 1-mile ride. Everything ran smoothly until Dr. Coleman decided to, as I said at the time, “ride around in circles and create some big gravity waves, then plow through them to knock some of the remaining dirt/pollen off the front of the waverunner.” Hmm. A sharp turn at low speed, a wave, and suddenly we turned it over and wound up in the river, wearing regular clothes and shoes. Great idea.
At first (and still now) it was funny. The kill switch disengaged, the boat stopped and righted itself, so we just needed to get back on. Not knowing how, I tried to just muscle my way up there. Funny how gaining 40 lbs. and getting 10 years older changes your ability to do chin ups. I slipped, and having removed my life jacket slammed my chest into the side before going back in the river. Urgent care this morning diagnosed the broken rib. Anyway, we drug the boat to the bank, stood in the almost knee-deep spongy plant life that was decaying at the bottom, and finally got back aboard using a downed tree for leverage. Soaked and smelling like a water treatment plant (Charles tells me that’s typical when you stir up those decaying weeds, etc., at the bottom of a river), we rode back, happening to notice my KEYS to my boat, the cabin, and others floating (apparently they had come out of my pocket) in the river on the way back, and we called it a day. If only a barge had come by, it would have made a better story. Except for my mom’s waverunner insurance carrier, that is. When I write my JB style book, I’ll have several stories, too (see end of blog post for summary of another one). Pictures below.
(Pictures of keys are re-enactments before we left.)
I could tell many other stories like this, but one of the most famous is the “Jitterbug” fishing lure, which hangs in my office (see picture) because, after getting it hung in a tree while on a fishing trip with NWS forecaster Jim Westland in 1995, I decided to dislodge it by pulling on it with the fishing line. It came loose alright, and shot like a missile straight into my jaw. Fortunately, it missed the bone, but my dad figured (correctly) that it would make a good conversation piece, and had it shadowboxed for my 21st birthday that year.
Come on, now. Calculus, cloud physics, and a fishing lure from the ER. I guess maybe the moral is to laugh more, even if you need to laugh at yourself.
Enough for this morning.
